Rejection is quite possibly one of the most difficult things to encounter and it can become easy to internalize and take personal. Dealing with rejection can cause us to brace ourselves before we ask questions, become hesitant when taking risks, and sometimes we can become avoidant, in an effort not to encounter it at all. The reality? Rejection is unavoidable.

In this episode of The Relentless, host Dr. Julie Gurner, speaks with award-winning stand-up comedian and actor, Adam Ferrara, about dealing with rejection and how to bounce back from it.

Adam shared how he was called back 10 times when he was auditioning for the hit TV show, The Sopranos. “Even though I didn’t get the result I wanted, I got success by being called back again.” Adam didn’t allow him not getting selected for the role in The Sopranos get him down, he found his success in being called back. Adam did, however, get a callback for a role in Nurse Jackie, which was in the same studio.

Naturally, rejection alone doesn’t build character. We are in control of how rejection impacts us and how we respond to it. Below, Adam shares some great takeaways of how he’s learned to manage rejection, internally.

Key takeaways

  1. The moment before.  Organize your thoughts, have realistic expectations, and monitor your execution. These factors help us internally manage how we respond, even though the outcome or overall circumstances may be out of our control.
  2. Ask yourself, “how can I use this to get better for the next thing?” One takeaway Adam says he’s learned from perceived failure, or disappointment, is sit in it and see what’s there for him. Sitting in it may look like reflecting on what you’ve experienced for a few days, coming back to it and writing down three things you were able to take away from it.
  3. Keep showing up.  Adam says, “Your life is going to happen when you’re sleeping. Just keep showing up.” Rejection can stop us in our tracks but if we develop a resilience, we will be able to bounce back, time after time, and keep going.

More from this episode

Rejection may be unavoidable, but you can bounce back from it. Adam says being relentless is when you keep getting up off the floor and doing it again and again. What about you? Can you be relentless, even in the face of rejection? How can you take away something positive from a negative experience? The answers to this and more are waiting for you in this episode of The Relentless.

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